I’ve always thought of my life as episodes from Friends, coming up with “The One With/Where/When…” titles when something significant happens throughout my day. From watching my baby on a sonogram to confessing my annoyance over confusing my baby for being a girl, I have always enjoyed making references to the now classic sitcom. Instinctively, as I plan my upcoming wedding, I’m often led to look back at an episode or two.
We’ve all (I mean Friends fans) seen it over and over: Ross and Emily’s wedding, Ross and Rachel’s Vegas wedding, Carol and Susan’s wedding. Rachel’s ex-fiance and ex-best friend’s wedding, Chandler and Monica’s wedding, and Phoebe and Mike’s wedding. And in each wedding episode, there’s a lesson we can take away. Well sort of.
Here, I share just some of the many “lessons” I learned about weddings from Friends. I could think of a lot more but these are ones that are vital to remember if you’re a bride-to-be.
Agree on How Much You Want to Spend
One of the things that Monica had struggled with during her wedding preparations was how to get Chandler on board with her when it comes to the budget. Monica, of course as Monica, already had a big celebration laid out in her head (and scrapbook) ever since she was little. Chandler on the other hand, was hesitant on spending all his savings on a “party.” Likewise, Phoebe and Mike, had to go back and forth to a charity because they couldn’t seem to decide on whether or not they want a fancy wedding or just donate the money to less fortunate kids. It’s crucial to make up your mind and agree on how much you two, as a couple, are willing to splurge.
You Can’t Have Your Best Friend as the Planner
A day before her wedding, Phoebe decides to fire Monica as her planner because she couldn’t take Mon’s tyrannic way of organizing the event. Although she later realized that she needed the bossing around after all, things got a pretty uncomfortable between the two girl friends. Just like in any business plan, it’s not a good idea to work with a close friend on something that you want to run perfectly. Sure, your friend will make the best effort to make you happy on your big day. However, grownups as we are, we know that things don’t always go as expected. And when the going gets tough, you wouldn’t want to be quietly frustrated so as not to make things awkward, or worse, be in a heated argument with someone you would have wanted to share your special day with. So think carefully and set some ground rules you can agree on before actually hiring a friend.
Your Best Friends Can, However, do Other Things for You
This is especially true for DIY weddings like mine. My friends have been bugging me about how they can help and while I still don’t have any specific assignments for them yet, it’s comforting to know there are extra hands willing to help me should the need arises. In the series, Rachel and Phoebe proved their loyalty to Monica by helping her get the wedding gown she’s been eyeing on even if it means sorta beating up another bride. Or what about that time when Monica had to pick up Emily’s wedding dress and the girls end up wearing bridal dresses while drinking? Talk about squad goals, right?
Hire a Photographer
While some may advice you that one of the easiest ways to cut down on your wedding expenses is to not hire a professional photographer, Monica and Chandler’s wedding would tell you otherwise. The day after the wedding, Chandler realized that he misplaced the cameras! To fix that, he and Ross went to some strangers’ wedding held in the same venue to take pictures and make it look like the Bings’ wedding. This actually made me sad that my sister once assured me that they have hired a professional photographer so they were not completely picture-less. I never found out if this was true. So, better be sure your celebration is properly documented and you can do that by paying someone who’ll take responsibility for it. To add, one of my best friends who recently got married revealed that one of her wedding regrets was not hiring a seasoned professional photographer. The one they hired was a colleague but a novice. It was affordable, yes, but let’s just say she wasn’t completely happy with the outcome.
The Woman can Pop the Question
Partly because she was crazy in love and partly because she grew tired of waiting, Monica nervously made a bold move to ask Chandler to marry her. This is not a very popular opinion but I believe that in reality, women can pop the question as much as men can. It may not be done straightforwardly but I have seen my own friends giving their men ultimatums. It’s crazy. Not to mention, risky. Some ended up badly but most of which are now happily married. After all, we all know men need a little nudge every now and then to get your point across.
Be Ready for Unpleasant Surprises
Monica had to give up her wedding dress in exchange for booking Chandler’s favorite band. Emily was devastated to find out that the church she and Ross were gonna get married in was almost completely reduced to rubble. Phoebe and Mike almost did not push through with their wedding because of a terrible blizzard. Nevertheless, they all found a way to turn things around. Monica still looked stunning in her wedding dress. Emily and Ross’ dimly lit ceremony couldn’t be more romantic (the ambiance, not the incident that occurred, that is). Phoebe walking down the aisle in the streets of New York to the Beatles’ “Here, There and Everywhere,” hands down, remains to be my favorite scene of all time. I still get a little teary-eyed each time I play it in my head.
Say the Right Name
Finally, this. I’d probably be amused at a certain level if my fiance would pull this off. If you intend to do it, remember two things: make sure your other half is a fellow fan and make sure it’s “I take thee, Rachel” and not some other name. Otherwise, please make sure to say the right name.
How about you? What’s your favorite wedding tip from Friends? I’d love to hear it! ♥