5 Things I Wish I Wouldn’t Hear as a Mom in 2016

2015 had officially come to a close and if you’re like me who became a new mother in the year that was, then perhaps you can safely say that it had been the most eventful, swiftest, most challenging yet meaningful year you’ve ever had. I know I can.

Enter year 2 of motherhood: 2016. By now, you must have gotten the hang of it. Although you still often complain about not having enough sleep or daydream about being completely undisturbed while getting a massage at the beach, you have now boldly embraced the entirety of being responsible for another else’s life. By now, you have also gotten used to hearing contradicting parenting tips and by now you’ve not only learned to filter them, you’ve also learned to develop your own.

Personally, I’ve had my fair share of “Did she just seriously say that?” and “Finally, someone gets me” moments. Along with the confidence you’ve mustered in the last 365 days is the art of knowing when to bite your lips or speak your mind when it comes to matters of your little one.

And so with another year starting anew, here are 5 things I wish I will never have to hear as a mother in the next twelve months. I’m not speaking on behalf of all mothers, but I’m sure I’m not only speaking for myself on this.

  1. Boy or girl? In one FRIENDS episode, Rachel had to put a ribbon on her daughter’s head while expressing how furious she could get if one more person asked if Emma’s a boy or a girl. I’ve seen this episode a number of times before even becoming a mom myself. That was when I discovered that it might be indeed offensive to ask a parent such “harmless” question. Now that I’m a mother, I realized that it’s not actually offensive, it’s more of… mind-boggling. You dress your child in lacy pink or put together a boyish jumper and some people still don’t get the obvious clue. I am not associating colors and clothing style with sexuality, it’s just something every parent would do: put clothes on a baby based on what have been accordingly labelled and purchased.827949d5d3c9b72213d9c6442b7859df
  2. Are you sure it was necessary? Of all the terrible comments I’ve heard about giving birth via Cesarean section, this one’s got to be the worst. And believe me, I’ve heard a lot, including the ever disturbing “You were not able to take the pain, did you?” I feel that questioning anyone’s method of giving birth is just downright rude. I would never forget that one time when someone told me that CS might not have been necessary, giving me a look as if I was just being dumb and that the doctor had fooled me just to get more money. I’ve grown tired of explaining to people why I had to do it, but I still feel that they need to know that it was either that or we might have lost the baby. And I shouldn’t have to. It didn’t matter how much we were billed or how much pain I had to endure after the operation, all that mattered was that we were thankful we had that option.
  3. Can he walk now? To be fair, some people use this as a conversation starter. That’s totally alright, just as long as you don’t follow it up with “Mine started walking independently when he was just 3 months old!” Wait, what? I think it’s adorable how Continue reading

The 5 Super Powers You Develop When You Become A Mother

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Often, we hear mothers being called “superwomen,” described as “amazing,” and tagged as “miracle workers.” And oftentimes we see them shrugging off the compliments as if they were unnecessary for something that is expected of them. But if you look closer, behind the shrug is a knowing grin, for they know they just pulled off another superhuman stunt.

Mothers, our kind of breed, is not rare. In fact, it’s so common no one notices how cryptic we can be sometimes. What is rare however is the ability to mutate into a version outstripping the average use of the human body.

Yes, your mother is an unmasked superhuman and her sharpest, most vigilant state was when you were just a baby.

Amid your afternoon tantrums and 2:00 AM senseless cries, she emerged triumphant, thanks to Continue reading

Motherhood is a Life-Sucking Pretentious B*tch

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No matter how much you admire your mother or how fascinated you are with your now responsible married friends, you will never truly grasp how astounding motherhood is until you become a mother yourself. But even then, you’ll still find how difficult it is to fully comprehend its vastness.

While most mothers would melodramatically describe how seeing their child smile to them for the first time was the moment they realized they were now a parent, my “moment” occurred while I was in the toilet a few days ago. After about an hour of exhausting all of my techniques to put my four-month old to sleep, I was finally able to run to the bathroom to pee. But just as I was about to give a long sigh of relief, I heard him again, this time with a screeching, more demanding cry. He hates it when he wakes up at night and not feel my presence within two feet. And he makes sure that he’s making a strong statement. Between his helpless cries echoing around the house and my defenseless state of just waiting to finish peeing, I had an epiphany: this was motherhood.

Between his helpless cries echoing around the house and my defenseless state of just waiting to finish peeing, I had an epiphany: this was motherhood.

“Life will never be the same,” everyone told me before, during, and after I gave birth. Turned out, I didn’t need that much reminder, given that his first six weeks in this world found me struggling

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Baptism Celebration With A Dash of DIY

Perhaps one of the things I was rushing to do once our baby was properly settled at home was to have him baptized. Baptism months after birth has always been mandatory for both mine and my partner’s family. But aside from this fact, it was an important step to take if we wanted (and needed) to take our little champ to places. I’m not that religious nor am I superstitious, but there’s this belief that it’s bad luck to travel with an unbaptized child and as I always see it, there really is nothing to lose if you allowed yourself to give in to these kinds of conformity every now and then.

With less than a month’s notice, it must have been the quickest party planning I’ve ever done (aside from a spontaneous one last year) and having my baby literally in my arms 80% of the day didn’t help with the necessary preparations I wanted to do with the tiny decor details. The biggest challenge was that I couldn’t be at the reception venue to do or oversee the set-up since I needed to be at the church for the actual baptismal rites. Thankfully, I got help from my supportive sisters who flew in from Hanoi and Manila, and my dear cousins, one of whom was a professional interior designer whose creativity I trusted when it came to executing what I wanted. With a detailed “how-to and what-to” guide and a bag of knick-knacks I managed to prepare at 1 am before the big day, we were able to pull off the celebration just fine!

10991046_1033647033315411_697250878661470573_n copy copyThree huge images of the celebrant welcomed the guests! The banner was especially designed by the

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One Day Four Weeks Ago

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Ironic. The night I gave birth was the blurriest night I could remember.

December 23, 2014, 2:00 AM. I woke up to the familiar wave-like pain in my body. Wave-like because it felt like as though a wave was making its way from my back and crashing onto my abdomen. Familiar, because I’ve been feeling it for at least 12 hours. It was only after doing a lazy research that I realized it could be a sign of labor.

We got to the hospital only to have me humiliated because apparently, my cervix had been dilated to an astonishing 1 centimeter! You need to be at least 10 cm. to get on with the delivery. “Are you effing kidding me?” was all I could mumble in my head. The pain was already so damn excruciating and with a taunting grin, the student doctor told me that it was yet to worsen with every dilation. How comforting.

I was ready to be sent home under false alarm. But instead, I was informed that I had to take a couple of tests and be monitored because the baby’s heartbeat was not stable Continue reading

Our Bright Streak of Sunshine

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37 weeks and it’s a flighty mix of excitement and anxiety. The ever supportive dad-to-be captured some shots, this one being my favorite, at home just so we’ll have something to look at a few weeks from now, while we actually hold our little sunshine and see if he’s as good an acrobat as he is now in my belly. ♥

Photo by DM and taken amid Typhoon Hagupit, which hit our city but thankfully did not do much damage.

DIY Baby Shower For It’s a… Boy Oh Boy!

I’ve never attended a baby shower in my entire life, but even then I knew it’s something I wanted to throw myself. I’m one who can never resist an opportunity to go down and dirty with the DIY preparations. The baby themed invitations, giveaways, dessert table – they just keep my adrenaline going.

It was only after doing a little research that I learned that there is actually an ongoing discussion about who should be throwing the shower. Traditionally, they say, it’s the expectant mom’s friends and family who should be hosting it. But as mommy forums would prove it, 8 out of 10 moms wished they had plan the event themselves. Okay, I just made the figures up but that’s basically the popular sentiment.

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Luckily for me, I got to enjoy being part of the planning while having the necessary support, logistics and budget wise. I wanted it to be simple but with every detail well thought of. It was my dear friends
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